It's all been said... but here's my 5 cents (in truth)

They say your twenties are the years you’re meant to make mistakes. Now I understand that there are certain things can only be understood through experience. I do however feel that age and wisdom do not ALWAY go hand in hand. I happen to know a few “aged” folk who have less sense than a teenager, let alone someone my age! I also happen to know a large amount of twenty-something individuals of sound and mature judgment-I live with two such individuals. So the whole age and wisdom thing is highly debatable, I feel. Yes, certainly with experience comes knowledge but if we don’t actually learn from the experience, and continue to act as we did when we were young, it is as good as not having had the experience at all!

 I can honestly say that at my (somewhat) tender age, I have certainly made my fair share of mistakes and bad judgment has overwhelmed my decision making far more than once. I shall not proceed to list the undertakings of my slightly ill guided youth-nothing good can come of it. What I now need to do is “grow up”-mature, if you will. Learning from the mistake is one thing, but to truly mature, one would need to repair the damage made by the mistake and change one’s self accordingly-so as to make a success rather than failure of oneself.  You can’t go back, you can’t undo what was done, you can only face the fact that you f-d up and get on with repairing yourself. I say “yourself” because like it or not, the mistakes we make affect us as a person, they tend to bite juicy chunks out of the steak that is your self-esteem. There is usually a point where all seems lost, hopeless, end of the world-ish… If and when this happens you have to give yourself a proverbial “headslap”!!! Self-pity aint going to get you anywhere!!!!  Yes, it sucks to look back and think of how things went wrong or what could have been, but they did go wrong and you have to accept your hand in it all! I have fully acknowledged my hand (perhaps both were involved) in my past mistakes. I tend to joke about it-to soften reality’s blow, but fact is, I f-d up, I made bad choices and yes they sting when thought of-some even make me feel physically ill. But, it’s over. I don’t want to say one can’t go back-you can, very easily at that! Repeating mistakes is easy, truly learning from them-by CHANGING your ways is infinitely harder-but equally possible!!!

So here I am, not trying to undo the past but trying to re-shape my future, despite my past inaccuracies.