See what's there, not just what you want to see...

I fear I may have been a bit quick to judge. Recent events have caused me to take a look back at my first post and I feel the need to review and amend a few things. I am afraid that the initial post is a tad biased and stems somewhat from a slightly bruised ego. The past has left me a little insecure (a revelation I CRINGE at and saying it out loud-admitting that I’m afraid and that I have been hurt and have myself been marred by my previous relationship-admitting weakness, this is a tough one at that, for weakness implies to me that someone else had strength over me-that I ALLOWED that someone else to have strength over me and I was badly hurt in the process) and as such I reacted inappropriately, childishly even. Not taking into consideration that the subject of said post may in fact be a chivalrous man who was somewhat shy and simply didn’t want to go rushing into anything, that he too may have suffered in some way (relationship-wise) in the past. And let’s face it, as much as we have grown from and healed since our past relationships, they do inadvertently effect how we approach a new/potential relationship. Sometimes with more caution, other times we may feel the need to take more risks but either way, they have a definite effect.

I have no right to, if and when I am with a guy and he fails to make some sort of advance to show that he is interested, assume that he is simply not interested. I can also not automatically assume that a guy is ball-less because he doesn’t come up to a girl and ask her out (am still struggling with this one though!).  The point is, I cannot be as sexist and facetious as to assume that men are not equally as affected and marred by relationships as what women are.

I am now looking at things very differently (or trying to at least) because I do not wish to be a cynical hag who slanders men and who ends up in a feline infested house (I am merely making this slightly extreme and outlandish generalisation to illustrate a point) ALONE, because I was too stubborn to notice that I am not perfect and things are not going to just magically fall at my feet. No, in order to find real love and be in a (proper-meaningful-working) relationship, one must first be open, despite the fear, doubt and pain stemming from the last/past relationship/s (which is far easier said than done) but  very possible, in time.

One must quiet the battlefield within, the one in which fear and doubt and pain are like the shielded army, outnumbering your courage and hope and faith by dark masses. Tougher victories have been secured!! I’m not going to quote Braveheart or 300 (don’t worry) but will say this: MAN UP!!!