Thursday.... 2

So this week we celebrated Claire’s 26^th Birthday. Rileigh and I had conjured a weekend of fun for the celebration, last weekend. It started with dinner at an Italian Restaurant, followed by dancing the night away (at a no under 23’s club). The Saturday evening we spent giving ourselves a little at-home-spa-treatment.

We decided to keep it all a surprise and presented Claire with a series of riddles and clues leading up to the weekend’s events. Friday came and Claire still had no idea what the plan was, I was revelling in every minute of the suspense-I love surprises-even if they’re for someone else! We had her pick a sexy number from the (combined) closet. We all went for above the knee dresses, despite winter’s nearing clutches. So all dressed up, we headed off and were joined for dinner by Zoe and her boyfriend. After dinner Zoe went home as she felt ill but her boyfriend joined the three of us as we ventured to the club.

Upon getting our drinks and taking up a spot in the club, we were pleasantly surprised to observe that we were in fact surrounded by an inordinate amount of (very) good looking men. For Rileigh and I this was somewhat amusing since we had not really been “out” since our status changed to that of single.

Claire was pleasantly surprised and was enjoying herself tremendously, we all were. The night however sparked my interest with respect to the interaction of twenty-something’s in a social environment. It has come to my attention that a club-environment is in fact THE ONLY environment in which the male twenty-something feels “confident” enough to actually approach the finer sex. Bars don’t seem to do the trick, perhaps it’s the dancing vibe in the club and the ability to get slightly up close and personal on the dance floor and such, which enables them to “man the fuck up”.  Only, they aren’t though, manning up that is, since the only way they seem to be able to do so is under a state of semi-intoxication, in an ill-lit, loud environment. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy this “interaction” as much as the next girl, I would just like to know why they (the twenty-something men) can’t approach a girl in broad day light, without any form of alcoholic beverage being a catalyst thereto…

So I am left to wonder, are we too intimidating (which I doubt) or do the males of our time suffer from a condition of ball-less-ness? I am starting to lean towards the latter… Pure frustration drives me thereto! I know chivalry is dead but a girl can’t ALWAYS do the chasing! I would rather like to be pursued than to pursue! I’m not saying court me like back in the day, but just don’t be afraid to come up to me and strike up a conversation-during the day-sober!!!

I intend on making it my next little project, to observe and try to better understand WHY it is that men cannot approach woman with ease. Sure there are the few gallant (and perhaps valiant) attempters here and there, these are however few and far between and sadly tend to fall within the creep side of the spectrum… By this I mean they tend to prompt that little voice inside your head say “back away slowly, this one’s trouble” and not trouble in that “Hot-broody-bad-boy” kind of way, but rather the “escaped from a state penitentiary” kind of way… Alas!

I do however remain eternally optimistic and hopeful that there ARE men out there (non-psycho men, who are both decent and attractive), who do not suffer from said “ball-less-ness” and who will prove my theory wrong!

Background...

Initially I had decided to give you a brief overview of my past, so that you may better understand where I am in the present-I decided against that however! Writing about the past seemed to take me off on little tangents and I am not yet ready to expose myself so.

Instead, we shall start at the end of last year (being 2010). I broke up with my boyfriend of three years, two weeks before Christmas.  Sounds awful, because it was, I had loved him but had not been truly happy with him for a very long time. I had that feeling in the pit of my stomach (the one that one SHOULD listen to but so often doesn’t), the feeling which was unavoidably telling me that I was not in the right relationship and that I was not going to find true happiness with this man. I tried blocking it out though, I moved in with him and pretty much changed myself in the hope that I would feel THAT feeling, the one people always talk about, that feeling where you “just know” that you're with “the one”, even during hard times… I never had that, couldn’t find it, couldn’t get myself to feel it. So, I left him, devastated and heartbroken, him, more than me. I took it better than I had expected. I was heartbroken indeed but more relieved than anything else, like an enormous weight had been lifted off my shoulders. This feeling however, was quickly replaced by guilt. He took it worse however. I had become like a stone inside with respect to him, as opposed to the pathetic meek little girl I had allowed myself become during my relationship with him.  I do however not wish to speak ill of him, or cause you to think the same. He was a good man with a kind heart; his heart however should belong to someone other than me. We were far too dissimilar and so I had to sever the bond which was causing me to fade. I could now become strong again and regain the parts of myself which I had suppressed to the point of near extinction.

You remember I mentioned that I was living with him; yes well this meant upon breaking up with him, I was somewhat homeless…

My friend Rileigh came to the rescue though, she let me stay by her till January while I still had to go to work. I stayed with her for two weeks, until I went home for Christmas.

January I spent at another friend, Zoe, who stayed in a garden flat very near to where I worked. Zoe was planning on moving in with Rileigh and Claire (another friend of mine), in February. The initial plan was for me to take Zoe’s place in the February when she moved out but Zoe decided to keep her place, so I took her spot in the house with Claire and Rileigh. It was while sleeping on Zoe’s couch that the subject from my previous little anecdote contacted me…

So February came at last and the three of us moved into our new place, it was awesome (still is). Claire’s boyfriend lives in the same estate, along with Zoe’s boyfriend. It’s cool having the guys near, makes it more sociable. So, did I mention that Rileagh’s boyfriend and my Ex, (who are really good friends), moved in together.

We have been living happily in our little house for four months now, in which time I changed jobs, Rileigh broke up with her boyfriend and Claire’s boyfriend had to go (rather far) away on business.

That pretty much brings us to present  day-well to last week Friday at least, where the next segment will begin. During which time I will ponder the ball-less-ness of the twenty-something male.